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Slut shaming is neither your duty nor your right

4 Comments

Society’s point of view reminds us that men are designed to want sex, while women are designed to withhold it.

Men have learned that sex with a female is their entitlement.For a man, sleeping with a lot of women can be a point of pride. For a woman,owning of her sexuality is a point of shame.Men can brag about their “number” — and be praised for having a high one!Throughout history women’s actions and sexual freedom has been regulated by men and religious groups who try to control women’s bodies.

 

Why are we so intimidated by sexually liberated women?

Why are we okay with the use of slut-shaming as a weapon to silence them?

Why there is a ‘Code of conduct’ for women?Why our culture still views female sexuality as threatening?

 

In the time and era when we are celebrating feminism why are people still tearing women down over their sexuality?Why there are codes of ‘feminine’ behavior?Why value of a woman lies in her body and her sexuality rather than her intelligence and personality?

 

Shaming refers to criticizing women and girls for their way of living if it doesn’t match to the societal expectations.Women are often ridiculed for the way they look, the way they dress and their presumed level of sexual activity.Slut shaming is a way to degrade and belittle women for apparently expressing their sexuality, through the way they dress, talk, dance, ‘flirt’, even walk.Slut-shaming is everywhere.It comes from those neighborhood aunties to your distant relatives to your friends and surprisingly from your partner as well.Being judged,being shamed and being labelled are almost synonymous to being women.When people see a woman who’s confident in herself and her sexuality and they personally are not, their response is to attack and tear her down to make them feel better about themselves.

 

“Women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized”,How many of you have heard this ?

If a woman wears whatever she wants to wear, talks openly about her sex life or has had several relationships in the past, it doesn’t make her a slut or someone who is “asking for it.” It just means that she is open about it and would rather live her life on her own terms and be happy, than follow social norms and stay unhappy.It’s unfortunately common that rape victims are blamed or labeled as a “slut” who was asking for it.

 

Slut shaming on Social media:

Social media makes it even worse.Women are being judged and shamed not only for their physical appearance or kind of attire but also number of male friends they have,kind of pictures they put…Unwelcome sexual comments, jokes, or gestures,name-calling,sexual bullying are becoming common in any social media platform.

 

Effect of Slut shaming:

There are real and devastating consequences to slut-shaming.Many girls/women who have been slut-shamed often have body-image issues and depression, anxiety, and thoughts of suicide are linked to slut-shaming.Slut shaming is also a form of bullying which means that serious action can be taken against those responsible.

 

How can we stop slut shaming?

Sometimes we might not realize that we ourselves can be responsible for or involved in slut shaming. By paying closer attention to the way words we use and their meanings ,at least we can try and use it in more positive ways.Putting an end to slut shaming needs change in attitudes towards women and promote a culture where women are respected and treated equally.

 

Can we make a conscious effort to eliminate the ‘Slut’ word from our vocabulary ?

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They Call Me Nari

Hi! I am Anushree Dash… Freethinker,
1 Part Entrepreneur
2 Parts Blogger
3 Parts photographer
4 Parts explorer, Too many Parts. A free-spirited,non-conformist,independent,adventurous,boho soul and an admirer of life.Loves my Indian roots, Culture, Aesthetic Living, Saree, Poetry …

4 Comments

  • July 26, 2020 at 3:00 pm
    Raj

    Hi Anushree,

    Nice thoughts and thank you for writing in black & white. We will not be able to change the mindset of the people, it’s always good to accept the reality. Everything starts from home, parents have to inculcate the true values when the kid is small on how to behave and respect the girls/elders/teachers/public and others.

    Many of my friends come home boys & girls both. My neighbor had a problem especially when girls come and I never used to bother. One day a dog met with an accident and my friend immediately took the dog to the hospital. My neighbor saw that and through my maid I came to know that they started talking good about my friend it seems. People take time to understand the reality unless there is a rape/some major issue happens in society or something happens to one of their family members.

    I always respect the girls when they give back when any guy pass a comment. It will take time to change the mindset of this society and every one has to play their role.

    Please keep writing your thoughts.

    Cheers,
    Raj

    Reply
  • August 10, 2020 at 1:17 pm
    Bharati mishra

    Very nice article

    Reply
  • August 16, 2020 at 5:29 am
    Satrajit Sanyal

    Excellent observations Anushree, and beautifully articulated. We need more such observations and thoughts to move into the public discourse space to begin a change narrative. This could very easily be the point of departure. Keep writing.
    Cheers & Stay Safe and Blessed
    Satrajit Sanyal

    Reply

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